For VSEPR with lone pairs, remember the "steric number" – count bonds and lone pairs on the central atom. Then, the molecular shape is based on the arrangement of atoms only, pushing the lone pairs into the "invisible" positions. For your examples, SF4 is see-saw, ClF3 is T-shaped, and XeF4 is square planar. I draw these in my notebook while my son explains his engineering diagrams over video call, both of us trying to make unseen forces *sampurna* in our minds.
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